porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
