U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
