It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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