You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
