Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Blood and glitter go together right?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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