Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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