every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
