Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
