you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
