If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
