I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize