yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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