I looked at my own cervix.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
