Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
