took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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