dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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