Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
