ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
