trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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