I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
