I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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