Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Still dying that you shit outside
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
