...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
