Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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