what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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