But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
50% drunk capacity currently
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
