what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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