Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I am spending my child support on dildos
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
