he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
