im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize