Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
