So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I want her autograph on my taint
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
