He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
