Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
