So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
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