**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I didn't notice because vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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