Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Randomize