i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
