operation harelip BJ is a go
time to smoke my breakfast
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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