i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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