My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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