even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
my nose is crying tears of wow.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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