Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
her vagine was all disorganized.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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