Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
