i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
