Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
