im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
