Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
