I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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