No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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