my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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